CONFLICT MANAGEMENT / COMMENT GERER LES CONFLITS SELON LA BIBLE

Biblical Steps in Managing Conflict among Christian Workers

By

Marc E Simeon

• Conflict Identification and Resolution in a Church Staff
• Biblical Steps in Managing Conflict among Christian Workers
• Discerning the causes of Conflict
• Normal Conflicts
• Diversity
• Disagreements
• Personality clashes
• Frustrated parishioners
• Conflict in Ministry an anticipated Reality
• When there is lack of communication
• When there is immoral and unethical behavior
• When there is performance dissatisfaction
• When there is Frustration in Leadership style
• When there is power Struggles
• The right timing to confront conflict
  (Norma Cook Everist)
• When the time is right, not in the heat of the moment
• When you are ready with information
• When you can meet in a neutral, safe place
• When the situation requires immediate attention to prevent escalation or danger
• Confronting Accusation Conflicts
  (By Horace L. Fenton)
• Be sure the task is yours
• Investigate the charges thoroughly
• Confront with courage
• Confront in love
• Negative use of avoidance
  (By Norma C. Everist)
• As a mean of continual denial
• As a mean not to value certain people
• As a way to think that the conflict will go away
• As a way to not have to claim our own authority
• Negative use of avoidance, Cont.
• As a mean not to admit we were wrong
• As a passive aggressive move to get what we want
• As a way to get out of a situation, leaving someone else to clean up our mess.
• Positive uses of avoidance
• Giving time to Regain composure
• Securing the safety of others and self
• Devoting energy to other conflicts of greater importance.
• Preserving fragile unity and allowing time to strengthen the group
• Positive uses of avoidance
• Providing reasonable time to gather necessary information
• Clarifying the issue and gaining some perspective
• Inviting the necessary parties to be present
• Reconciling Battling Members
  (Edward Dubson,1992)
• Mistakes to avoid
•   Avoid to Mediate alone
•   Avoid taking sides
•   Avoid to rush into intervention
• Avoid Ambiguous Words
•  Always
•  everything
•  Never
•  Everyone
•  All
•  Nobody
•  I can’t remember the last time . . . .”
• Conflict Resolution
  (Horace L. Fenton)
• Agree to Disagree
•  Accept the fact that Differences can happen
•  Find Temporary Solution
•  Look for Healing in long run
• Biblical solution to conflict

• Proverbs 16:32 (NKJV)
• He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, And he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.
• Pr 16:32 ¶ Celui qui est lent à la colère vaut mieux qu’un héros, Et celui qui est maître de lui-même, que celui qui prend des villes.
•  

• Biblical solution to conflict

• Proverbs 20:3 (NASB)
•  Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man,
  But any fool will quarrel.
• Pr 20:3 ¶ C’est une gloire pour l’homme de s’abstenir des querelles, Mais tout insensé se livre à l’emportement.
•  

• Biblical solution to conflict

• Proverbs 12:16 (NKJV)
• A fool’s wrath is known at once,
  But a prudent man covers shame.
• Pr 12:16 ¶ L’insensé laisse voir à l’instant sa colère, Mais celui qui cache un outrage est un homme prudent.

• Biblical solution to conflict

• Proverbs 15:1 (NKJV)
•  A soft answer turns away wrath,
  But a harsh word stirs up anger.
• Pr 15:1 ¶ Une réponse douce calme la fureur, Mais une parole dure excite la colère.

• Biblical solution to conflict

• Proverbs 29: 11(NKJV)
• A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back.
• Pr 29:11 ¶ L’insensé met en dehors toute sa passion, Mais le sage la contient.

•  

• Biblical solution to conflict

• Proverbs 10:19 (NKJV)
• In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise.
• Pr 10:19 ¶ Celui qui parle beaucoup ne manque pas de pécher, Mais celui qui retient ses lèvres est un homme prudent.

• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 16:28 L’homme pervers excite des querelles, Et le rapporteur divise les amis. (LSV)
•  28 A perverse man sows strife, And a whisperer separates the best of friends. (NKJV)
• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 18:8 ¶ Les paroles du rapporteur sont comme des friandises, Elles descendent jusqu’au fond des entrailles. (LSV)
•  8 ¶ The words of a talebearer are like tasty trifles, And they go down into the inmost body. (NKJV)
• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 26:20 ¶ Faute de bois, le feu s’éteint; Et quand il n’y a point de rapporteur, la querelle s’apaise. (LSV)
•  20 ¶ Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; And where there is no talebearer, strife ceases. (NKJV)
• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 26:21 Le charbon produit un brasier, et le bois du feu; Ainsi un homme querelleur échauffe une dispute. (LSV)
•  21 As charcoal is to burning coals, and wood to fire, So is a contentious man to kindle strife. (NKJV)
• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 15:18 ¶ Un homme violent excite des querelles, Mais celui qui est lent à la colère apaise les disputes. (LSV)
•  18 ¶ A wrathful man stirs up strife, But he who is slow to anger allays contention. (NKJV)
• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 6:16 Il y a six choses que hait l’Éternel, Et même sept qu’il a en horreur; (LSV)
• Pr 6:19 Le faux témoin qui dit des mensonges, Et celui qui excite des querelles entre frères. (LSV)
•  
• Be Aware of the Whisperer

Pr 6:16 These six things the LORD hates, Yes, seven are an abomination to Him: (NKJV)

Pr 6:19 A false witness who speaks lies, And one who sows discord among brethren. (NKJV)

• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 12:18 ¶ Tel, qui parle légèrement, blesse comme un glaive; Mais la langue des sages apporte la guérison. (LSV)
•  18 ¶ There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, But the tongue of the wise promotes health. (NKJV)
• Be Aware of the Whisperer
• Pr 12:18 ¶ Tel, qui parle légèrement, blesse comme un glaive; Mais la langue des sages apporte la guérison. (LSV)
•  18 ¶ There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, But the tongue of the wise promotes health. (NKJV)

262 FCD – Serrons nos rangs

1.

Serrons nos rangs autour de notre Maître,

Soyons unis, la victoire est à nous !

Par notre amour, faisons à tous connaître

De notre Dieu combien le joug est doux.

Refrain

Frères, frères, son nom est amour ;

Frères, frères, aimons-nous toujours !

2.

C’est par amour qu’ll entra dans notre âme

C’est par amour qu’ll lave nos péchés ;

Nous embrasant d’une céleste flamme,

Que son amour nous retienne attachés.

Refrain

Frères, frères, son nom est amour ;

Frères, frères, aimons-nous toujours !

3.

Amour, amour ! Insondable mystère

Qui nous unit, et tous ensemble à Dieu !

Amour, amour ! si doux sur cette terre,

Amour, amour ! oh ! que sera-ce aux cieux ?

Refrain

Frères, frères, son nom est amour ;

Frères, frères, aimons-nous toujours !